Sunday Thoughts

Lately I’ve been having difficulty getting the words out. My thoughts are disjointed paragraphs, and maybe that’s a reflection of life right now.
I feel confused.
For now, my life is happy, organized and peaceful which i totally and completely enjoy, but i can't help myself wondering about the futur.

I'm not one who lets the futur happend.
I'm not one who dreams about things without making them concrete.
I've always thought that i'm the master of my own destiny (sounds so powerfully wierd) and since i'm terrified by the idea of waisting time, i've to take things in hands.
Seriously.

At this point you will probably start to ask what's wrong with me (and honnestly, i don't have a clue) I have a satisfying job with a permanent contract, a decent salary, a cute little studio in Paris, i have friends, the best family and a billion useless material things like pretty purses, shoes, an Iphone and a fancy coffee machine.
It's supposed to be enough to feel proud and complete (Is it? ).
I guess i could live like that forever. Playing the game of life and pretend to be happy and most of all pretend like i don't expect anything else from life.
That's the problem.
I do expect more.

But i'm not a reckless 20 years old anymore. I have to take this seriously and aknowledge the fact that this will have some impact on my life for real before to quit everything i have.

So for now, i have quiet a few possibilities. They are all involving big changes. 

The first one :

Moving to Thaïland for a year. Working for a french company in Chiang Mai. Having a year full of exotism, culture, new traditions and be able to learn a new language.

The second one :

Spending 6 months in Vermont, volonteering in a program for men and women getting out of prison so that they can successfully transition back into the community.

As you may know, i've studying criminology and i am passionnate about the subject, so this one definitely is the most interesting, minus the volonteer part. which obviously means no salary.

The third one :

Spend one year in Canada. I will have a visa, so i will be able to work if i want/need to or just travel around and discover this amazing country if my savings are allowed me to.


That is for the big ones, i have a few other but less concrete. 

I have no idea about which one i will choose or more likely which one will chooses me.
My only hope is that one choice will lead me to my destiny.
I'm trustfull and have no fear. But for now i've to decide.


It is wide open...